Accident Report

Well my wives and mistress, it was only a matter of time. The first recorded wifely injury. Now, i know, being the naughty wife and all comes with it’s responsibilities and expectations, and i really wish i could report my injury as a result of a particularly hot and heavy naughty experience, but alas not.

No the first reported wife injury comes from sheer ego. I’m afraid i let a lethal combination of breast and bra confidence get the best of me. All that strutting with the girls out in front, back arched has left me almost bedridden with a bad back. Who would have imagined such pain caused by such gain?

Now, i know, ego is one of the main benefits of all things wifey, so maybe an ego related incident isn’t as bad as all that… what say you?

I do have to say that one of the side benefits of being a injured wife, has been the “hands on” attention i’ve received. Didn’t manage to get a 6 or 8 handed massage, but i did manage to get the orgasm’s organizer to give me some love and attention… errr rubs, as well as a fabulous 45 minute table side massage from the testimonial rich blonde bombshell. Ohhh la la

So don’t pity me please my lovelies, just keep the touching up, i’m sure i’ll be better in 6 months to a year!

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The Mistress Speaks

Taking it to the blog

The Mistress emails:

The blog is outstanding!! But why stop there? How about a full length feature film on the Wives?

Casting options :

Joan - Karina Lombard, Susan Sarandon or Sandra Bullock
Wendy - Chalize Theron, Jodie Foster or Diane Lane
Jan - Meg Ryan, Sharon Stone or Gwyneth Paltrow
You - Hilary Swank, Sigourney Weaver or Angelina Jolie
Me - Jenna Jamieson, Paris Hilton or Pamela Anderson
___________________________________________________________

Wife #4 responds

I personally think the blog is just the starting point to the best selling book… which then turns into the movie.. which then turns into 4 wives and a mistress on the red carpet!!! Whoo HOO

Can you frigging imagine the lingerie companies clamoring for our endorsements? Think i’d go for the jewel encrusted $2M one from victoria secrets. I can’t even begin to imagin the bra confidence that would come with that!

Hmmmm. Now, i’m wondering if we need to chat with maryanne now while we are in the seed stage, and make a deal with her for free bras for the wives and mistress in exchange for her name up in lights? anyone got a lead on a good agent?

Love your casting list. My vote would be

Joan: Karina Lombard or Susan Sarandon (tossup)
Wendy: Charlize (no question)
Jan: Sharon (hands down)
Me: Hillary Swank (i do love the angelina, but would rather take her to bed than be her)
You: hmmm not sure you’ve given us the appropriate choice… Jenna Jamieson would be the default winner…. personally thinking Natalie Portman, Jennifer Connelly, or my choice Gina Gershon

 

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The Summer of 2006 - Montreal Outgames

The summer of 2006 was a busy, busy time for the Wives and the Mistress. One noteable event took place in the beautiful city of Montreal, with naughty wife as the hostess with mostess, even though she was dealing with a flooded basement at the time.

There was the Pooh Pooh’s (otherwise known as Marla and Shadi), who spent the afternoon with their beloved Martina.
The group photo only contains two of the wives, and no mistress. The other wifely members were greatly missed.
cup-cake
xo

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Wives Glossary of Terms

Wifelarious - Term used to describe language, actions or thoughts funny enough to make the wives screech with delight.

In the Vault - This term is used when confidential information is passed on to the sacred wifely circle. Violating this term is a breach of all things wifely.

• Wife-nectness - This is term used for the level of internal communication needed to be in touch with the wives.
• Crack-nectness - Variation used for the wives who use Blackberries as their means of being Wife-Nectned.
• Peeberry - This is a term used when the blackberry falls into the toilet, when one is multi-tasking. Though this somewhat risky behaviour can result in the blackberry writing things that it shouldn’t, it exemplifies the level of connectedness necessary to be a good wife.
• Lap-nectness - Variation for those using the traditional laptop (the procurement of said laptop need not necessarily be via the traditional conversion of a willing straight woman… though it is prefered)
• Touchectness - A physical variation of the level of connection needed in the wifey circle. This could include breast fondling, hugging, kissing, humping of legs… the level of which is decided upon by the participating wives
• Mis-demeanor or mis-behavin’ - an instance of mistress misbehavior (highly encouraged by the wives)

The Clubhouse - This is the main gathering place for the wives revelry. There are a few rules associated with the clubhouse.

• The clubhouse wife always cooks and serves, the other wives simply enjoy. No exceptions to this rule, unless kitchen is in fire and wife asks for help.
• The clubhouse wife’s dog must give nose in crotch greeting.
• There must be laughter and frivolity, though serious talk is permissible.
• There are sub-clubhouses, where same rules apply. (if large big nosed dog not available, other pets may be substituted).
• Each wife must offer up future vacation fund money of $5 on each clubhouse get together to be used sometime in the future for a ultimate version of a wifely gathering.
• Greetings must be peppered with much kissing of lips, fondling of breasts (long nail scrapes welcome), and humping of legs.
• At some point in the gathering, there must be a show of bradrobe. It can be a simple show of strap, or a full frontal exposure depending on the level of bra confidence.

The Orgasmic Organizer - Name of wife #1. Stems from her natural organizing ability, as well as her orgasmic activities (which all other wives are somewhat jealous of). The Orgasmic wife is know for her enthusiasm, her flirtitude, and her curly Fuckable Hair.

Beverly Bouffant - Name of Wife #2. The name stems from her stewardessly activities. Beverly is known for her reluctance to leave the runway. She is known for her most lovely bradrobe, and the manner in which she fits into it… especially the blue ensemble. She is also renound for her stubborn nipples.

The Blonde Bombshell - Name of Wife #3. Name stems from the fact that this wife has notably the most lovely Fuckable Hair. She is also known for her prowess on the dance floor, and in the bedroom. She comes with “Testimonials”.

The Naughty Wife - Name of Wife #4. The name stems from recent activities, which at press time, remain in the vault. Mostly she’s known as the Knotty wife, as she’s most often in a more anxious then naughty state. The Naughty wife is also known for her globe trotting, famous person adventures.

• Fuckable Hair - This is a term used to describe hair that’s been properly washed, blown dry, and shaken out in preparation for a sortie. The end result is that the person donning such hair is rendered “Fuckable”.
• Testimonial - This refers to a note, an email or any other form of written text, outlining exactly a wife’s talents. Most often refers to talent of a sexual nature, but is not exclusive to that. Comments of a personal character nature are acceptable, though not nearly as fun for the wives to read.
• Stubborn nipples - This is a reference to the state unruly nipples might get into at in-appropriate moments. There are times when perky nipples are warranted, in the middle of a meeting at work… not so much. The purchase of a proper bra with a certian level of padding, is the solution to the inappropriate display of stubborn nipples.

The 6 handed massage - The wives have developed this special technique. The subject, typically.. though not always, is one of the wives. The recipient wife should find a comfortable position where three other wives can also be comfortable and close at hand. Once relaxed, and suitable disrobed, the wife in massage receptive position will receive a 6 handed massage. The massage typically starts with one wife at the head, another at the shoulders and back, and another at the legs and feet… but this 6 handed massage may evolve and travel depending on the recipient’s receptability.

The Mistress - The mistress is an integral part of wifey life. She’s typically a cute, admiring, supportive person in said wifey life.

• Mistress duties - statement of duties/work description under (constant) review
• Code of conduct - The mistress shall mis-conduct herself at all times (See : Mis-demeanor or mis-behavin’)

Flirtitude - (shorter name variation:flirty pants) - an essential wifely requirement whereby the finer art of flirting (done especially when wearing a piece from one’s bradrobe) is skilfully displayed at each and every forum possible.

Bradrobe - To be a good wife, having a good bra inventory is of ultimate importance. The term Bradrobe, refers to this inventory. There are some guidelines to this bradrobe: One must purchase these bra’s at Maryanne’s. This purchase must be done as a group. One much check one’s modesty at the door. Most important to bring one’s sense of humour to these fittings. The purchase of bra must come with Brapproval. (See: Bra Approval).

Brapproval - This is the term used for the wives reaction to one putting on a test bra. If there is much ooohhh, ahhh’s, fondling and a glint of lust in wives reaction, one has reached the level of approval necessary to purchase said bra.

Pillows - Used to describe a set of breasts that have a certain volume. Volume and Voluptuousness can be a desired quality amongst some of the wives. Though it is not uncommon that a wife may covet a set of somewhat less voluptuousness ones.

Brattitude - An overwhelming need to thrust one’s breasts upward and out in their newly housed and lovely undergarments from, of course, the Bradrobe. Brattitude is also the term to explain one’s need to show off one’s finery in a public place. Brattitude is a sure sigh of Breast Confidence

• Breast Confidence - describes the feeling a wife develops when wearing the appropriate bradrobe. Signs of Breast confidence include the straightening of back, thrusting of breasts in a upright position, and the burning desire to rub one’s self up against another set of breasts. More advanced, and much sought after signs, include initiating the bra revelling ritual at supper, flaunting one’s bradrobe in public, as well as initiating the “Feel Test”.
• Feel Test - When one has bra confidence, the first steps are more visual in nature. The over all appearance, potentially a glimpse, ultimately a reveal… all a part of the state of being. The Feel test is one beyond… looking is one thing, feel another all together. If a wife is in the ultimate state of Bra confidence, she will often urge others to feel the look, as it’s the defining moment of bra confidence. The feel test in it’s extended form enters the bedroom realm, and can become quiet sexual in nature.

- To be a good wife, having a good bra inventory is of ultimate importance. The term Bradrobe, refers to this inventory. There are some guidelines to this bradrobe: One must purchase these bra’s at Maryanne’s. This purchase must be done as a group. One much check one’s modesty at the door. Most important to bring one’s sense of humour to these fittings. The purchase of bra must come with Brapproval. (See: Bra Approval). 

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